You can't change the way your partner deals with his situation, but you can change the way you react to what he does. I'd find a good talk therapist who can work with you to help you get through this difficult time. My recommendation would be a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist. Medicare will pay for your visit and your local mental center can help you find someone.

Very good advice. My husband shot himself so know what you are going thru.

I’m no expert but I would tell them to stop 🛑 being selfish think 🤔 of those that love them and what they may be going through because of this self distrust attitude